I put this moment here

2 11 2011

This.

No, this is not me and not particularly what I went through or what I’m going through—except for the parts that are exactly like what I went through or what I’m going through.

And my penultimate-ish panel involved a small green stone instead of horror movies and Skittles.

But I did have my Eskimo vagrant moments. Still do. Probably always will.

There are worse things.

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7 responses

3 11 2011
dmf

mine is more along the lines of a hypo-manic burnout, can’t get traction, make productive connections, make things really work, and then I push harder til I break down. have learned how to slow down a little but not really how to make nice with the other kids, play their gossip games, settle for for what is and keeping things the same. How does one stop wanting things to be better, people to do what they say, people to pay attention/take-care?

3 11 2011
4 11 2011
absurdbeats

Settling—that’s the damnable word, isn’t it? And it doesn’t help that I’m not at all sure what it means.

Perhaps our only way out is for us—you, and me—to pay attention, to take-care; or maybe it’s not a way out, but the only way, regardless.

4 11 2011
dmf

yes paying attention/care is vital but sometimes it’s still nearly impossible to weigh-out what is a reasonable expectation/stance and when I’m just being unrealistic/narcissistic.
And then even if I can intellectually come to terms with certain limits how to bear it emotionally?

4 11 2011
absurdbeats

“I can’t go on; I must go on.”

4 11 2011
dmf

indeed, as Levinas learned the hard way and than taught us life carries on whether it makes sense or feels good or not, with or without our permission/consent/will il y a…

6 11 2011

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