The heaviness, the heaviness

30 07 2018

I’m no longer shocked by stories of men who think they are owed others.

I mean, I doubt sexual abuse is shocking to any woman, although I do admit that the authority with which these men asserted this access did shock me. I was used to stories of men who bragged that they got away with it or who thought that bitch had it coming; the breeziness with which Rose and Lauer and Weinstein et. al. attacked women, well that was something.

No more.

So now I notice other things about these stories, these men: they don’t have to remember. The women, they remember, they can’t forget, but the men? They don’t recall, don’t remember, don’t remember it that way, have no recollection.

Over and over and over again:  Did I do this? I don’t recall, so, no.

The assaults were too inconsequential to be remembered, too ordinary, too light. It was nothing.

This is power: to forget, to offload the memory, to deny there was ever any burden at all.




5 responses

31 07 2018

it’s always brutal, as long as there are these kinds of power differences they will be abused but I’m heartened to see people find new means of solidarity and support.

7 08 2018
9 08 2018

gotta say I appreciate these people just coming out and saying what they really mean, may not change things in terms of the outcomes of elections but as least the choices will be more explicit:
Laura Ingraham: In some parts of the country “the America we know and love doesn’t exist anymore. Massive demographic changes have been foisted on the American people, and they are changes that none of us ever voted for, and most of us don’t like … this is related to both illegal and legal immigration”

10 08 2018

I fear it. Instead of “revealing” themselves as racist, it simply pushes definition of racism further and further away. “I’m not anti-black; I’m pro-white! How could that be racist?”

It’s freeing up all the wrong people.

28 08 2018

that’s democracy for ya, a country this big and diverse can’t hold up for long in an age of hyper-media and the death throes of industrial capitalism…

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